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Words of Wisdom
Friendly fire ain't.

Murphy's Military Laws
Diversionary Glossary
Keyboard Plaque ]

The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards.
Other definitions...

Polls
Have you ever had "relations" in your office? (Be honest, now.)
Yes
No
Define "relations"
All things being equal, would you rather be self-employed or someone else's employee?
Self-employed
Employee
Idle rich
Who would you trust more with your money?
Corporate America in 2003
Gollum (my precioussssssss)
More diversions  
Meeting Survival

A pasttime coined in the Golden Age of Dilbert, Buzzword Bingo is a perfect meeting survival option for any number of players.

 

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Meeting Survival

Prepare to impress with this meeting catch phrase generator.

 

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Meeting Survival

Take a break with assistance from this "soothing" program.

 

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Meeting Survival

Corporate Spit-Partners LLP: The Conference Room Challenge

A mildly titillating means with which to while away weary meeting-room hours for members of the corporate carnal loop.

 

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Meeting Survival

A single player meeting distraction where observing annoying, kiss-up colleagues makes you a god of the meeting room.

 

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Meeting Survival

A multi-player meeting distraction in which consensus-building, nerves of steel and kissing-up are the name of the game.

 

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Meeting Survival

Two fingered rock/scissors/paper

A diverting and discreet variation of the classic game for use in useless meetings.

 

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Meeting Survival

Frozen in time

This game is a fantastic meeting enhancer and allows the competive spirit of otherwise bored meeting attendees to express their creativity and tenacity to "strike a pose".

 

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More diversions  
IMPORTANT LIFE EXPECTANCY SURVEY

Life is too short
    not to lengthen it...

Important Survey Reveals Long-term Medical Importance of Active On-the-job Stress Reduction

An impartial international survey just concluded by the Statistical Research Arm & Kidney of Office Diversions announced Thursday that between five and sixty minutes per work day of active engagement in an intrinsically non-productive activity, such as a visit to Office Diversions, can prolong your life.

”Thanks to the Office Diversions’ jokes I've been reading and word search puzzles I’ve been doing at work for the past few months,” said Elbert Clamptrow, 47, a fictional Actuarial Assistant from Lima, Idaho, ”I expect to live at least three weeks longer.”

Clamptrow explained that he generally programs his voice-mail with ”Elbert is in a meeting” in order to achieve the clam and dental focus required to find a particularly challenging up-left diagonal. We think he meant ”calm” and ”mental”.

Furthermore, a five-minute visit to OD has been proven to be at least 88% less likely to give you lung cancer or heart disease than a five-minute cigarette or narcotics break.

Other results indicate dramatic life-span improvements thanks to OD-provided on-the-job therapy, as catalogued in the chart below:


 

Estimated results for daily OD visitation over a period of fifteen work-years:

Minutes spent visiting Office Diversions / day
Extra life (weeks, est.)*
0
0
5-10
1-15
11-20
16-40
21-60
41-200
>60
-20 (due to stress associated with premature canning)


Chart courtesy OD Research Arm & Kidney. Survey consisted of numerous off-the-cuff questions asked, often over beer, of various still-living friends and acquaintances of OD staff members. Individual results may vary. Results are inconclusive, as individuals questioned have not yet exceeded their expected life expectancies.
* Barring unforeseen death

CROSSWORD PUZZLES

JIGSAW PUZZLES

OFFICE JOKES

WORD SEARCH PUZZLES

OFFICE PRANKS

OFFICE GAMES

OFFICE POLLS

MEETING SURVIVAL

OFFICE HAIKU GENERATOR

XTREME OFFICE SPORTS

OFFICE LABORATORY EXPERIMENTS

OFFICE ANECDOTES

BRAIN TWISTERS

GAMES DIRECTORY

ENTERTAINING LINKS

EMAIL EAVESDROPPING

OFFICE OCCULT


HUMOROUS OFFICE MERCHANDISE

 

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Did you know...?
PARIS HILTON is an anagram of : A HIP NOSTRIL, LOIN HARPIST and LOST HAIRPIN.
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